My Horse Doesn't Like My Friend...

Hello

So, my boy seems to have taken a disliking to my friend. I've looked after my friend's horse for over 2 years and obviously since having my own horse for 7 months now I've focused more on my horse, still helping my friend with hers' as she's a very busy mum of 3 children though. She has been making time to see her horse more often with quick visits between school drop off's and appointments and has also been helping me in return feeding and taking off my horses' rug in the morning occasionally.

What is odd is that I keep getting informed of all the terrible things he is doing. Barging through a gate and escaping onto the road whilst im on a plane most likely flying over the property at the same time... (i just got back from a 3 night holiday). Apparently he has kicked her twice when he has pushed through a gate (but sounds more like a knock). He's not standing still for her when she takes his rug off and the first time she fed him he even reared and kicked the bucket out of her hand!

This all of course is unacceptable behaviour. My poor friend is now somewhat scared of him and has been warning me for my safety that he is acting like a dangerous, hot thoroughbred.

However, with me he does not barge through gates, waits respectfully for his food and had not once reared at me or near me or kicked me. At the moment I'm getting told by my friend how to be firm with my horse... but what I'm doing seems to be working well for me. But for some reason whatever my friend is doing isn't working too well...

I'm thinking he could be jealous that she is there to focus on her horse more... or maybe he just misses the chat i have with him when i go and take his feed to his tub... could it be that he is more a 1 person horse and we've got such a tight bond that he doesn't consider my friend as a part of the herd.

A year ago with his past owner he was taken to a clinic where he actually got tied up and abused with a whip to the point of exhaustion because he's a 19 year old who would walk round a log instead of over it at the clinic. So he is very scared of whips (therefore we don't use them) and i believe he has some trust issues now because of it.

He's been the usual angel for everyone else at the yard... just not with my friend...

Does anyone else know of a horse that for some reason or another doesn't like someone? Or does anyone have any ideas what could possibly be going through his mind? It's all not helping my headache and I really don't want my friend to get seriously hurt. Unfortunately I'm not there when she handles him but I'd love to watch without him knowing I'm there.

Any sort of friendly replies are very welcome Just thought I'd give posting on here a shot.

Thanks,

Charlotte

Hi Jovial, a friend of mine recently sold her gelding. He is a cheeky boy who needs to know who is boss. His new owner has such a sweet heart and he decided that he was going to be a rotten little toad for her.

I was asked to come and show her a few things with him and once she had started to work out the ques he was perfectly behaved. To teh point where she was wishing he would be naughty so I could see the bad behaviour.

As far as I know he has been a good horse ever since. He just needed to know who was boss.

So what we used to teach him that was some of the seven horsemen's games. Most important was free lunging him with frequent changes of direct and moving at the minimum speed dictated by the rider.

Sounds to me like something similar might be happening here.

yep I agree with SM, sounds like your boy is walking all over her just because he thinks he can. One persons version of being firm with a horse may be completely different to yours, for example my horse is a neurotic sensitive silly thing and while I am firm with her to gain her respect, when my friend is over and she handles her firmly the mare loses the plot because she is too firm. Its a funny delicate balance.

Perhaps you and your friend could get together and you could show her the ways in which you handle him to gain respect. Like SM said ground work and basic games could really help in this instance.

oh no!!
is this Bales??
very very unusual behaviour for him!! i have never even seen him with his ears back! Maybe it has something to do with what happened at the clinic ';' poor thing. sounds like he getting defensive maybe expecting to be told off. (not an excuse to act like that though) what are you feeding him? is he on pasture during the day? small things can change a horses behaviour, its just a matter of finding out what that small thing is or was.
pm me if you need any help, hope things improve as he doesnt have a nasty bone in his body **)

serendipity said:

yep I agree with SM, sounds like your boy is walking all over her just because he thinks he can. One persons version of being firm with a horse may be completely different to yours, for example my horse is a neurotic sensitive silly thing and while I am firm with her to gain her respect, when my friend is over and she handles her firmly the mare loses the plot because she is too firm. Its a funny delicate balance.

Perhaps you and your friend could get together and you could show her the ways in which you handle him to gain respect. Like SM said ground work and basic games could really help in this instance.

Click to expand...

Yep * Maybe a bit anthropomorphising saying your horse picks and chooses who he likes

I'd go out with your friend when she's handling him and see how he behaves, and see what she does differently to you, and if she's game to keep handling him show her how to put him in his place. It's probably just a simple case of him testing her out and now that she's nervous it's just getting worse because he can sense it.

Thanks everyone for your replies, thanks so much! I now don't feel so alone in the matter.

I'll see what I can do with my friend but it's becoming hard to explain that I'm not the one who needs to show him who is boss because he already knows that I am. But I will see.

It is very unlike him Archie, I'm feeding him wheaten chaff, couple handfuls of lucerne chaff, kind n kool pellets, millmix, tuffrock EJF. And he is on pasture 24/7

But, he was better with her the last time she handled him yesterday apparently. And he seems alot happier in my opinion than the first day I got back. So I'm thinking it has a lot to do with the change of routine!!

Well, it turns out he has formed a really close bond with my friend's horse. And if I'm not there and she takes her horse away from him to groom, play with him, ride him Bailey then gets really jealous that the horse is giving my friend attention and not him. Haha. He's not been aggressive towards her since my return so some improvement there but he really does love this horse. I'm glad they're friends because I have looked after my friend's horse for a couple of years and I wanted them to get along. He just can't stand not being near him!

Just a little update, we seperated these two and now Bailey doesn't worry about his friend being with his owner and he couldn't care less if he is with someone else